From 20A

She believes that she was taken advantage of and recalled that everyone called upon her to assist with the new system and this created more confusion. She also alleged that there were serious glitches in the new system which saw money disappearing when placed into accounts.

“The system used to malfunction and nobody was doing anything about it… It was just too much,” she added.

Collapsed

And so it was that on Old Year’s night Moore collapsed.

She recalled screaming as the fireworks went off and telling her husband that she wanted to kill herself.

Moore praised the local mental health system. She recalled that it was around 2 am on the day after New Year ’s Day when her husband called the mental health hotline on the advice of a friend and by 7 am they were ready to receive her.

“They worked with me. They really tried but by then I think I was too far gone because I was not talking and nothing anyone was saying was reaching me. Sometimes I would just sit there and stare and they had to transfer me to the Georgetown Hospital psychiatric department and that is where I met Dr Bhiro Harry,” Moore said.

She also lauded the initial treatment she received by Dr Harry, who, she said, recognised her from the bank.

It was in April of last year, Moore said, that she finally started to get better but then came COVID19 and this created more problems for her as she could no longer see her doctors in person.

But then she was using medication which she believes she may have not used correctly and went into a manic/bipolar state. She also developed what she described as, “nine month belly”.

She revealed, “One day I just collapsed on the floor and I was angry…because I told the doctor on WhatsApp that I believed the medication was doing me something but he would just encourage me to continue to use it.”

She had to be rushed to a private hospital where she was seen and treated by three doctors. The medication was flushed out of her system.

“Some of the anti-psychotic drugs caused me to want to kill myself,” Moore shared candidly.

“I did not have control over myself and actions. It was as if something was controlling me. I was fed-up of the depression; it was like my brain could not take it anymore.”

Show love

Moore called on Guyanese to show people love and not judge them when they are facing a mental health crisis. She said that were it not for the support of her husband, children and other family members, friends, and church members she would not have been able to overcome that period.

During her depression, Moore said, she was not always down. She made it her duty to get up and find something meaningful to do. She has been working on her walk-in-closet, she has assisted in painting the cupboards in the family’s newly built house and she has written a fitness book and another on herself titled, Just Believe. The latter is in the process of being published.

She and her husband also own Future Star Investment Construction Company, and she hopes to manage it once she gets better.

She resigned officially from the bank last November, even though she had not set foot in it since 2019.

Moore also occupies her time by listening to others who might be going through difficulties and assisting some older persons by taking them to the doctor if they have no one to accompany them.

“I want to share my story to empower people. I actually regret trying to kill myself and I want people to stay strong and not give up. I am not 100 per cent back yet but I am not giving up,” she said. The toll-free mental health hotline is 655-safe (655–7233).

If you or someone you know is having thoughts of committing suicide, you can seek help from the Inter-Agency Suicide Prevention Helpline through the following: Telephone: 223-0818, 223-0009 and 223-0001 Mobile: 600-7896 or 623-4444

Email: guyagency@yahoo.com

Twitter: @guyanaagency

Whatsapp: 600-7896 or 623-4444

Facebook: Guyana Inter-agency Suicide Prevention Helpline